Part of my transition is improving my physical health, trying to lose weight and get out of the pre-diabetes range. The fear of becoming diabetic impacts all my food choices. I worry about this fear controlling me to the point where I slide on the eating spectrum from “I don’t care what I eat” to “I’m a crazy health fanatic”. I have a bit of an addictive personality and once I latch onto something I can become consumed but in this case I’m not obsessed just finally starting to care about what I’m putting in my body.
Now that I’m not working I have more time to focus on food. Food is not my primary concern but I can spend more time planning meals and thinking about what I’m eating rather than just mindlessly munching on whatever is close. I’m trying to be more adventurous with food, trying new foods and recipes. I’m reading labels, cutting back on sugars, and actually eating more food rather than binge eating. I’ve never been one to drink soda and I also describe drinking water as my one good habit. I’ve been amazed at how quickly I’ve been able to change my food habits even though I still have my cravings.
Yesterday I was determined to have a “splurge day” since I’d been eating so healthy and fighting cravings all week. I began checking take out menus, finally settling on one of my favorite types of pizza. I was so excited as I waited for my delicious meal only to take my first bite and taste only disappointment (okay maybe that was a bit dramatic but it just didn’t live up to my expectations). I ate a couple pieces, picking off the sausage because it was so salty, and threw the rest away this morning.
I felt bad throwing away the pizza (thank goodness I only ordered a medium) but knew I wasn’t going to eat anymore whereas in the past I would have probably eaten almost the entire pizza that night. I was worried when I ordered the pizza that I would overindulge and slip back into my old ways. Perhaps that worry prevented me from truly enjoying the pizza but I honestly think after almost a month of eating fresh foods, eating something so processed simply didn’t taste good anymore.
I’ve never been able to stick with any kind of diet so when I began this I was doubtful I could maintain. I think the reason I’ve been able to keep up this time is some of the advice I’ve been reading over and over throughout the years finally sunk in.
The changes I’ve made are not new revelations but I have three primary tips that are really helping keep me on track right now:
- It’s a lifestyle change, not a diet
- If I keep healthy food in my apartment, I will eat healthy food
- Don’t skip meals-eat at least 3-5 times a day
It’s been about a month since I began to change my eating habits and I’m confident I’ll stick with it this time. I look forward to the time when I don’t have to think about making better choices but until that time I’m going to keep doing what I’m doing and maybe if I want to splurge I’ll go with a homemade pizza.