Today I felt like a grown up. I went to the gym, dropped off my recycling and donations, and applied for health insurance. I sent a birthday card to my aunt, paid bills, and decided next week I will begin applying for jobs that I really want because it’s time.
Maybe if I had unlimited resources I would not be as quick to want to change (actually I would travel or go back to school) but right now I’m bored and growing concerned. I have limited resources and the dates I set for myself before the store closed are rapidly approaching. The days seem to be going by faster and I begin to realize at this point I’m simply procrastinating.
I tend to be a creature of habit, I find a place where I am comfortable and I settle in because I’m afraid of change. For 12 years my job was my comfort zone, I wasn’t happy but I was scared to try something new. Now, I’ve found a new comfort zone in not working and allowed myself to settle a bit.
The gym was the first step in breaking myself out of my new comfort zone.
My first few days at the gym have helped me to realize that I don’t want to become a hermit, I like people and want to be out in the world. I stay somewhat connected with people but it’s all technology, texting, Facebook, the occasional phone call. There’s no actual human interaction and I miss that face to face time with people.
One of my friends from work moved to the area I want to move because she can live with her family but we text all the time. I told her today I’m done being a hermit and I’m ready to rejoin the world. That really best describes where I’m at right now, it’s been fun and I’ll never say that I wasn’t grateful for this time but I’ve procrastinated long enough.
It’s time to rejoin the world! 🙂