I have lost my motivation.
Most of my day has been spent staring out the window or my computer screen. I did make it to the gym this morning after 3 days off but it was a challenge to get moving. I keep hoping I will get some burst of energy that will inspire me to do all the things I need to get done before this weekend but it’s not happening. I was hoping writing a post would at least make me focus on something for a bit but I keep stopping to stare out the window.
*leaves to get snack*
Maybe hunger was part of the problem, unfortunately I’m still struggling with my eating but I planned out my dinners for the rest of the week so hopefully that will help get me back on track. Last week I just wasn’t hungry but this week my appetite seems to be back along with a strange craving for red meat.
I could probably be a vegetarian with minimal effort, although I love chicken and fish plus every so often I really want a hamburger. I know when I’m craving red meat it’s usually because I’m not getting enough iron, which might also explain the lack of motivation. This is why I like writing because sometimes writing things out helps me find solutions. I need to take a closer look at my diet, so I’ve started tracking my food again plus taking a multi-vitamin and vitamin D (I have a serious vitamin D deficiency but I also hate taking pills so I slack sometimes).
I’m excited to go home this weekend for to watch the Oscars, also my mom and I are going to a musical called “Memphis”. It’s one I don’t know much about but sometimes those are the best ones. I’ve got some games I’m putting together for our Oscar viewing party so I wanted to get that finished up today; however I’m still fighting the urge to go lay on the couch and read my book (Game of Thrones, I’m obsessed).
I’m just feeling overwhelmed thinking about all the decisions I need to make, waiting to hear back from jobs, tracking my finances to see how long I can stay unemployed, cleaning stuff out of my apartment, trying to pack and clean some so I don’t have to try to do everything when I finally figure out a plan, working out and eating right, planning the Oscars party, going out of town, applying for jobs, etc. It’s a combination of the big things and small things, making me feel so scattered and unfocused that I just want to stop.
I think I’m going to finish up a few more things, write up a to-do list for tomorrow, and give into that urge, also tracking down some lunch sounds like a good plan. The to-do list for tomorrow will be packed since I didn’t get much done today but I’m confident by tomorrow I will have found my motivation.