Time for Reflection

Designing a blog has been a learning process and I find new ways to improve my blog almost every week.  Today I was tweaking the design on my blog and realized I never created an About page for this blog (now I do so you can read a bit about me and my blog). When I started this blog about 3 months ago I wasn’t sure what to expect or how long it would keep my interest.  Now I have 2 other blogs in addition to this one (one for photography, one for poetry) and enjoy writing almost every day.

I’d attempted to start a blog years ago on a different platform but didn’t receive any follows, likes, or any type of feedback so I gave up after about a month.  When I decided to start a blog I almost went back to the platform I’d tried before but instead decided to do some research (always the savvy shopper)  and everything seemed to lead me to WordPress.  I was pleased to find it easy to use plus I began to receive feedback almost immediately, which spurred me to continue writing.  I’ve found the blogging community to be tremendously supportive and I’m grateful for all my followers who comment, like, and help keep me going 🙂  Thank you!

Closing the store was my first post.  At the time I wasn’t sure what was going to happen next but I knew I was starting a journey of drastic change.  I was scared but optimistic and this still describes how I feel, even though I’m still not sure where I’m going I know I’m headed in the right direction.

I often compared my job to a relationship and when any relationship ends there’s always time for reflection.
Did I make the right choice?
Will I find someone new?
Am I destined to be alone?
Will I ever find happiness?

I learned so much from my job, gained skills that I’ll always use, and met amazing people but I still feel the job was like a dysfunctional relationship.  it was the relationship where all your friends say you should break up with your boyfriend but you’ve convinced yourself he’s good for you even if you’re unhappy most of the time because he’s nice and stable.  I was stuck.  That’s the only way to describe it, stuck in my job, waiting for “someday” to make changes but too scared to make any efforts toward that change.

Some of my deadlines have come and gone.  I truly thought I would begin applying for jobs at the end of January, find something within a week or two then move by the end of February, then I learned the application process is a bit more lengthy than anticipated, especially for the state jobs.  Fill out the application, answer the questions, application received, then a grading process based on the application, you’re either qualified or not, if you actually make it to the eligible list it might still be weeks until you hear anything.

If nothing else, I’m learning patience and gratefulness.  I’m at a place where I can be a bit picky and apply for jobs I really want but lacking in experience in the field is making it challenging; however, I’m persevering.

I’ve been able to focus on my health, creating new habits like eating right and working out.
I’ve been able to explore more creative endeavors like writing and photography.
I’ve been able to clear my mind and explore what I truly want to do in my life.

I’m questioning my decisions less. I did make the right choice to not stay with the company. I know I’ll find a new job and I’m not destined to be alone (unless I choose to be). I will find happiness but overhauling your life takes time and effort.

The tag you will see most often on here is “lifestyle change” because this is what my transition is all about, changing my lifestyle and transitioning into a stronger, healthier, and happier version of myself.


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