“It’s Complicated”

If my relationship with food was a Facebook status it would definitely be “it’s complicated” but I’m constantly striving to get past this stage into a healthy effortless relationship.  The one where I don’t think about it all the time, where I don’t waiver on my commitment, where food is not viewed as the enemy but a partner.

If you’ve always eaten healthy or never struggled with your weight it can difficult to understand how something as simple as food can be so complicated.  If you’ve found a place where food is fuel or where you know how to just eat when you’re hungry and not eat when you’re not hungry it’s challenging to understand how food can be an enemy.

In the past I was ashamed of my eating habits.
I hated eating with other people.
I hated people seeing what was in my shopping cart.
I hated myself for choosing to eat so much.

I say choosing because it was a conscious choice.  I would eat thousands of calories in a day but somehow justify it in my mind by eating practically nothing the next day then binge again the next day.  I can’t begin to imagine the chaos my body was in with binge-eating then not eating plus when I was eating it was processed foods, sugar, fat, with limited protein and nutrients.

I strive to reach a place of peace with my eating habits.

Every good food choice becomes a victory.  I have to be constantly vigilant because even though I’ve made progress I still have a ways to go before it’s easy.  I continue to work toward the mindset where the choices just happen naturally.  As I learn to make smarter food choices I step closer toward finding that healthy effortless relationship with food.

I don’t overeat as often (this last weekend was an exception 😉 )  because it’s not good for me and I hate feeling overly full. I use some of the small tips I pick up here and there to help me as I change my eating.  As a single person I’m getting better about making portions just for me but sometimes you can’t avoid leftovers.  One of my favorite tips is to put away left overs before you sit down to eat so you don’t have the temptation of going back for seconds…or thirds.

Lately one of my biggest challenges is learning the difference between hungry and bored.  I’m not working and I’m home most of the day so it’s super tempting some days (like today) to want to eat all day.  To combat this I try to keep busy as much as possible, drink lots of water, and the meal plans should help.

In combination with the meal plans I’m trying to eat at specific times of the day, especially for dinner because I tend to get involved in a project or binge watching episodes of Lost (What is with this island?) and lose track of time so I end up starting dinner at 7pm. The late dinner throws off the rest of my evening primarily my intentions of getting to bed at a reasonable time.

I’m going grocery shopping tomorrow morning armed with a budget and a strict list.  A couple weeks ago I impulsively bought some potato chips thinking I would be fine but ended up eating the entire bag in just a few days because it was convenient to grab a handful of chips every so often like when I was bored…I’m not gonna make that mistake again.

As I head out to the store I’m reminding myself of one of my favorite rules for eating healthy which is if you have good food in the house you will eat good food 🙂

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One comment

  1. Sassyfitnesschick · April 3, 2015

    You’ve got it…. having good foods in your house takes away temptation of wolfing on stuff that doesn’t support your health and fitness goals. Stay strong and take one day at a time!

    Liked by 1 person

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