When I was in Seattle with friends we took pictures together. I’ve always struggled with feeling like the fat friend in the pictures but I’m learning to get over it and enjoy the moment; however, I could not help myself from agonizing over one thing I noticed in the pictures, my slouching. I’m already shorter than most people so hunching over only made me look shorter and wider, like I was a hunchback.
I’ve been doing this for years but I’ve only recently started to notice it in pictures.
I began to try and figure out where my hunching tendency began. I’ve been busty since my early teens and in my teens-twenties my bust was something I was sort of ashamed of because I didn’t want to call attention to myself for the wrong reasons. I didn’t want to seem like I was flaunting myself so I slouched and hunched and hid. Reading through some online articles I realize this is pretty common for teens who develop early.
Now as I come to accept my body I realize this is how I’m built and I’m not flaunting anything it’s just me. As I grow older I realize every woman has things they don’t like about their body and while some things can be changed with diet and exercise, some things simply are what they are so I realize I have some choices. I can waste time and energy hating something I might not be able to change or I could simply accept it and be realistic about how much I can change….or I could invest in plastic surgery but I don’t like the idea of this route.
My choice is to accept it but working out is helping. I’ve lost 3″ off my bust. Back exercises and a proper fitting bra have helped to alleviate some of the back pain I was living with for years, yet I still continue to slouch. Even when I’m sitting I find myself hunched over my desk or slouching while sitting on the couch. It’s a problem.
After seeing the pictures I wished someone had told me to stand up straight but I also realized I need to work on my posture. It’s challenging because it’s just how I hold my shoulders so I don’t always think about it….well for the last couple weeks I’ve been thinking about it all the time.
Even as I sit here typing I’m trying to hold my shoulders down and back. It feels awkward but I know it will benefit my health plus I won’t have to look back at pictures and wonder why I was pretending to be a hunchback.